How to let go of food guilt for good and enjoy eating again
Today, I want to talk about food guilt.
Specifically, how to not experience guilt, shame or fear when sitting down to eat, and instead embrace food for what it really is: something that can bring you a sense of joy, satisfaction, health and abundance.
We are a society utterly plagued by diet culture - a pervasive belief that what we look like matters more than our physical, psychological and general well-being.
Most of us cannot sit down for a meal without labeling foods as good or bad or thinking of food as transactional, meaning it has to be earned based on what else you’ve eaten if you’ve worked out, etc.
It can feel like a never-ending battle.
I’ve dealt with these struggles myself.
But I’ve gone years, nearly a decade, without having any negative thoughts, feelings or beliefs surrounding what’s on my plate.
It involves a re-thinking of what food is, so that your relationship with it could be one of joy, satisfaction and appreciation - despite all the challenges you may face up to this point.
Changing your mindset, habits and focusing on health (not just physical appearance) are fundamental to this transformation.
In this post I’m going to delve deeper into all of it.
Start by changing how you think about food entirely
Feeling guilt or shame about food will never lead to feelings of happiness, satisfaction or success.
If you associate what you eat with how you look and what you’re worth, instead of your health and how you feel, you will never feel like you are enough and that there’s always more you can do (or less you can eat).
Even if you experience sensations of feeling or looking good by way of restriction, you know how short lived those feelings are. And that as soon as you wake up the next day, the battle with your self begins all over again.
We want to avoid negative emotions, only feeling “good” when we deprive ourselves, or shame and worthlessness when we indulge.
Food is nourishment and health is wealth.
This is how the healthiest people think - at least the ones I know.
It’s never about eliminating entire food groups to lose weight in a jiffy, or fear of what the scale says after a great dinner with friends.
It’s about choosing foods that raise our vibration and eating to not just live the length of one’s life but the width and breadth of it as well.
Thinking this way not only helps rid you of food guilt, but it tends to help you make healthier food choices and increase the quality of your life as well.
I know it has for me.
I’d rather not have to worry about or fear what I’m eating (every day, 3-5 times a day) by focusing on foods that have something to offer me.
The right good quality foods can improve gut health and allow you to better absorb nutrients from food that will help support your immune system, reduce inflammation, improve digestion and elimination and improve your mood.
Include more nutrient dense, plant-based whole foods at every meal and I guarantee your overall health and feelings about food will shift (improve!) dramatically.
Do it once in a while, and I’ll bet you see no difference in your relationship with food at all.
The strategies and habits that follow will help you take this philosophy and put it into action. They highlight how you can do more for your body at meal times and throughout the day, so you are focusing less behavior that’s harmful or disruptive to your mental, emotional and physical health.
Start by filling your plate with more natural, whole foods.
Eating a plant-forward diet, comprised of mostly natural whole foods was a game changer for me.
It marked the beginning of my transformation, and it marked the moment when I transitioned away from worrying about or fearing my plate and thinking more about what food has to offer me.
Natural foods, like fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds and legumes are the most nutrient-dense, fiber-rich foods available to us. They have the power to energize, nourish and heal us from discomfort and disease. They help us feel full, satiated and remove toxic waste from the body.
Choosing foods that benefit your body and mind, more often, is a great foundation for creating a healthier relationship with food and eating.
Take ownership of your meals
Cooking more, eating out less is another important habit that can help you let go of food guilt.
A lot of the time, feeling good about eating has to do with what you’re eating.
When you cook for yourself, you have more control (I hate that word, especially when talking about food, but I mean it in the most benign way) over the ingredients in your meals. Whereas restaurants often use things that are known to aggravate and cause dis-ease in the body like salt, sugar, heavily processed oils and more.
The more you do for yourself (research, shop, prepare your food) the more you learn how to eat to feel good.
Create a sense of joy around food
Connecting with your food is good for your brain, body and spirit - whether it’s sorting through and picking produce at the market or preparing and cooking your dishes.
There are lots of ways you can do this…
Eating seasonally. Apart from the benefits (produce is always sweeter, fresher, better tasting and more nutritious when in season), eating this way makes food feel like a treat you’re looking forward to and makes indulging in them feel truly joyous.
Learning about the ingredients you’re using, and what benefits they offer you, will make you appreciate them.
Eat with people who you enjoy. It can be your toddler or a great friend. But meals are generally best when shared with people who make you feel good.
Stop skipping meals
This is always a bad idea - whether it’s intentional or not.
Skipping meals is terrible for your health, and an easy way for you to lose touch with what your body needs and an even quicker way to deepen your fears surrounding food.
It causes your metabolism to slow down.
It causes the body to burn less energy.
It leaves you with little-to-no energy.
It makes you feel tired, sluggish, weak and shaky.
Eating good-for-you foods, regularly, will do the exact opposite for you.
It will rev up your metabolism, give you energy and provide your body with the nutrients it needs to function optimally. And when your body functions well, guess what? You feel good.
Learn to let go
This is a big one.
Things like following a particular diet, counting macros, or intermittent fasting (to name a few) may be useful and effective for some people, but harmful to others.
If you struggle with food shame, fear or guilt, then having rigid rules about eating, labeling food as off limits, and following external guidelines to tell you what or how much to eat, is probably going just exacerbate your issues.
Learning how to eat intuitively, on the other hand, can do the opposite.
This approach teaches you how to get in touch with your body’s cues and signals relating to hunger, fullness and satisfaction while learning to trust your body around food again.
The goal of intuitive eating is to break away from the cycle of chronic dieting. And it’s ideal for anyone who struggles with fear, shame or guilt or with their relationship to food as it relates to their body.
It can take years to undo and unlearn the damage that diet culture has unleashed on you.
It took me decades.
But I’m here to tell you it is absolutely possible.
And let me tell you, life (and food) is so much more enjoyable when you reject fear and shed the guilt and make space for healthier habits.
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